Joystick please

I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with computer mice. Mostly with me loving them and they, in turn, hating me.

Actually, that’s not true. I don’t love them.

In the last couple of years I’ve gone through four mice, with the first three dying due to cord complications and just generally being cheap mice. You get what you pay for it seems.

For the last while I’ve been using an Apple Mighty Mouse with pretty good results, though the scroll ball has been a bit flaky lately. And by flaky, it either doesn’t work, or generally will only go in the opposite direction I want it to. Very, very helpful. I’m sure it’s cheating.

So, after some google searching and numerous tutorials on rubbing it vigorously and other tutorials on not rubbing it vigorously or you’ll risk damaging it (shame that they appeared on google in that order) I finally found the last resort.

No, it’s not buying another mouse — it’s butchering this one.

This guy seemed to have the best instructions around so I went with him.

For the most part, amidst a few variations, it went pretty well. Pried it apart with my Leatherman, broke the seals, undid the cables and cleaned the four itsy-bitty rollers. Each time I said “okay, of all parts, I can’t drop this one” I did, of course, drop it. Not that it stopped me from saying it next time. I’m a slow learner.

Then came the time to reassemble and glue it back together with crazy glue. Sounds easy enough, right? Well not until you hear this little crack  and watch as this pool of crazy glue pours out onto the poor little guy. If only this was the safe-to-eat pre-school glue I remember from oh so long ago, then it’d a simple clean up. I’m positive there were vitamins in that brand.

No, this was the toxic, bonds forever and ever in five seconds or less brand now covering fingers and mouse.

My fingers might feel a bit funny, but at least the scroll ball works again!